I didn’t always know I had ADHD.
For a long time, I just thought I was messy, lazy, or bad at life. People told me I was smart, but my results never matched the potential they saw. I was always almost there, always catching up, always promising myself I’d do better next time.
Spoiler: I didn’t do better — not because I didn’t care, but because I didn’t understand how my brain actually worked.
My ADHD Experience: Learning to Live Without Shame
The Missed Signs
I was the daydreamer, the overthinker, the one who lost things constantly but remembered deep, emotional conversations from years ago. I thrived in creative bursts but struggled with structure. I could hyperfocus on things I loved and completely forget about the basics — like eating or responding to messages.
But no one thought it was ADHD. Especially not me.
I thought ADHD meant hyper boys who couldn’t sit still. Not quiet overachievers who just felt chronically overwhelmed and exhausted.
Diagnosis: A Quiet Revolution
Getting diagnosed didn’t fix everything — but it did give me a new lens.
It made me kinder to myself.
I stopped framing everything as a personal failure. I began noticing patterns, triggers, and moments when my executive function tanked. I started unlearning years of internalised guilt — and started learning how to build a life that works with my brain, not against it.
What Changed?
I learned how to:
- Reframe productivity as something flexible, not fixed
- Embrace routines that feel supportive, not punishing
- Recognise overstimulation before burnout hits
- Choose tools and systems that reduce decision fatigue
- Set boundaries without guilt
Some days still feel chaotic. But now I understand why — and I forgive myself more quickly.
Why I Share This
ADHD isn’t a flaw — it’s just a different operating system. But it becomes painful when the world demands we hide it or “fix” it to fit in.
You’re allowed to work differently. You’re allowed to need reminders, rest, and re-dos. That’s not weakness — that’s adaptation.
I created Zest Soul because I wanted a space where people like us could feel seen. Where we could talk about things like masking, burnout, emotional regulation, and the quiet grief of late diagnosis — without shame.
If you’ve ever felt like you’re “too much” or “not enough,” you’re not alone.
This space is for you.
These are my personal stories about how I discovered my creative outlets, such as writing or deeply connecting with music. I will also discuss the activities and strategies that help me manage my ADHD.